Six pm is still an endless stretch of afternoon away

Why 6pm? Well, that's when I head over to NGI's place. He's been working all day, from six to six, and will probably be very tired. I, on the other hand, only had four hours, which made today seem like a holiday.

 

 I got to go into the beautiful Swan Valley and enjoy the autumn colours, whilst I did the transfers from city to winery, from winery, via another winery and a chocolate factory, to the river cruise boat (My company does either a full day tour, city to city or a morning/bus day tour or a bus/afternoon boat tour, plus a half day bus only tour. There are all sorts of add ons).

 

On these sort of transfer days I don't talk as much on any of the other tours, for which people are probably quite grateful. I do get paid double time for Sunday rates, though, which compensates. I also get to indulge my time efficiency/micro managing bitch skills and, if it's a good day, I play music very loud and sing while I drive. Today was a good day. I also got to indulge in one of my favourite power ploys: Blocking in cars that park where the signs clearly say 'tour bus only'. Man, I love doing that and just raising a polite eyebrow when said owners of cars look plaintively in my direction never gets old.

 

NGI will be tired but he still wants to see me, and I him. In fact, we arranged this yesterday, after we had just left each other. We've been tentatively planning out the week ahead. Now I'm counting down the hours, and from his text messages, so is he. That doesn't mean sexual stuff, by the way, although it would be foolish to not acknowlege that agenda also. We'll have dinner (I cooked a stir fry and will take it over), go for a walk and watch a movie. And tonight I won't sleep over, because my girlies are with me this week.

 

But I can't not see him. I am trying very hard to keep this slow and distant (and this post won't be anything he can read) but when I wake up to a text message that says how much better waking up is when I am lying next to him, it's very hard not to melt a little inside. I keep on expecting things to change, for the blinders to be lifted. I am aware that I am probably blinkered by sex and I keep telling myself that the real him will show his nasty colours once his infactuation wears off. After all, why should I think that anything will ever go easily for me? Based on past experience, I always get the most complicated situations, even if I compoundly add to them.

 

This is a really nice guy, who appeals to me on every level. I should just walk away now and save myself the eventual complications. Damn him!

 

Read and post comments

This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Six pm is still an endless stretch of afternoon away

  1. Worker says:

    You know sometimes good things do come..enjoy it don't walk away..you deserve it !

  2. Kitty says:

    It's so much easier to be comfortably numb.

    Do you know that tonight I've tried on FIVE different outfits and done my hair THREE different ways? And I'm still not sure if I look cute or ridiculous. I ended up with braids, jeans, sneakers and a jacket – we are going for a walk.

    I am feeling really irritated that this man has reduced me to a level of simpering patheticness. If I do break up with him, it will be because of that, not because of the 'too good to be true' thing. I just can't seem to reconcile my feminist hackles with the behaving like a 14 year old actions. I am older, wiser and I DO know better. And yet it's almost impossible to draw back.

  3. Worker says:

    Just enjoy, it is OK to be young again 🙂

Leave a reply to Kitty Cancel reply