That was before I learnt that with just a computer and a credit card, I could cut a swathe through online stores. And I am very good at it.
I don’t shop online much because I simply can’t afford to. It is reserved for times I am really down and it makes me feel better. Therapy, as countless women have said.
I rarely buy things I need. I buy frivolous, useless things. Like thigh high red stripper boots, dvds that I can’t get here, a glorious lip stain, jewellery, sex toys.
I think I’ve worked out why I do it. It’s because they are all posted and I get the parcels through my mail box. There is the excitement of having someone give me a present. We all know presents mean love.
Somebody loves me and thinks enough of me to send a present.
Even if it is only me.