I woke up tired and sad

My day off today and I didn’t really sleep in. I didn’t sleep well, although exhausted, because I was expecting a call that never came.

 I have to go get my hair cut, which makes me feel sadder. I hate having my hair cut. But my daughter insists and we all know that I am scared of my daughter because she is exhusband in a female form, which is twice as scary. Plus which, she is a hairdresser and I have issues with those already. Daughter + hairdresser = scary to the power of infinity. I love my long, dark hair. She says no and I have to go blonde again.
 
And I felt sad too because I am supposed to have a loving supportive boyfriend in my life, who really isn’t. He doesn’t call when he says he will and I get the definite impression that I am a convenience in his life;an afterthought. I expect common courtesy from my intimate others, like calling and turning up on time and being there when they said they would. I know this is unrealistic; after all, none of them have ever done this, apart from exhusband, which is probably why I married him.
 
Some of these days I get up and hope that a frozen block of airplane toilet ice crashes down on me, just so I don’t have to do the whole keeping on thing. Personal selfopting out is not going to happen but I wish that the universe would recognise that I have had enough of it all, and just suddenly impact me out. I’ve had a great life, really, and I would prefer to keep that recognition of it before all the negative stuff drags me down too much.

I am tired and lonely and I probably need more cats and less people in my life.

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About quirkycharm

I like to think that I have a certain quirky charm but I am probably being optimistic. Acquired taste, perhaps, which many don't acquire. This is about my fifth blog out there. My hosting companies kept going out of business or my IT exhusband kept hacking into them and I would move again. I don't do twitter, I barely do facebook, I don't try and 'monetize' my blog. I love my husband, my grown children and my job and this particular incarnation of oversharing my life comes at a time when I am the most content that I have ever been. I write always, sporadically during the good stuff and exhaustingly during the bad.
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One Response to I woke up tired and sad

  1. Girasole says:

    Me too, but for different reasons! Bring on the cats!

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