Still waiting.

I have a guaranteed job already. Well, as guaranteed as anything is, without a signed contract and they mostly don’t exist in tourism, unless it is government. I know I could manage that job and it really was one I wanted until the potential option came up. Now it feels like I would be settling for second best.

I am waiting so that the Operations Manager can speak to the company owners and give a ‘yea or nay’ and then I can plan my future for next year accordingly. But I don’t like being in limbo and I especially don’t like feeling like I am stringing along the first company. I didn’t actually say that I would take the job and we agreed that I would do some survey tours in January to see if I was a good fit for the company: I am under no illusion that if somebody more suitable came along (ie a couple – and they are re-advertising, something they didn’t tell me but which I’ve seen) they wouldn’t immediately discard me. However, I feel I am not being 100% upfront and no matter how the game is played, my own duplicity really bothers me.

I don’t like the person I am currently being and it is making me very depressed.

About quirkycharm

I like to think that I have a certain quirky charm but I am probably being optimistic. Acquired taste, perhaps, which many don't acquire. This is about my fifth blog out there. My hosting companies kept going out of business or my IT exhusband kept hacking into them and I would move again. I don't do twitter, I barely do facebook, I don't try and 'monetize' my blog. I love my husband, my grown children and my job and this particular incarnation of oversharing my life comes at a time when I am the most content that I have ever been. I write always, sporadically during the good stuff and exhaustingly during the bad.
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