But I can’t stop crying.
I tried to do a park run this morning and cried in the rain, After lap one, I couldn’t bear bringing down the cheerfulness with sobs any more so left.I was hoping the rain disguised the tears but it pretty much didn’t.
Then I cried my way through a horrible four hours of people, trying to source x hundred sausages and x hundred onions for a fundraising sausage sizzle for SES, that I thought would be the easy part. No, the cooking would have been the easy part. I got to battle for parking spots in the rain and fight my way through hellishly overcrowded shopping malls, aggravating my crowd phobia. I got lost and panicked in the rain and got sworn at by queues of cars, aggravated I wasn’t vacating my spot fast enough. I cried through all that, the delivery of the goods (so professional) and then trying to drive home with no food in the house.
I estimate out of today, I’ve cried at least fifty percent of the hours I’ve been awake and I feel so dehydrated.
This feels like the worse thing that has ever happened to me and I can’t even keep it together when I try. My husband is away and I wouldn’t blame him if he never came home. I don’t get it why I cant stop crying.