Just had the health department on the phone and apparently my recent illness was salmonella, caused by a native animal (I didn’t touch one but it seems infected dust or water is enough). Only 4 people a year get it and it is confined to the Pilbara and Kimberley regions. Once again, I prove my specialness by contracting a rare disease.
I was so sick, though. Even when I went back to work ten days ago, I felt dreadful and was still just taking tiny teaspoons of pureed apple for nourishment. The company flew me up to Kununurra, a two and a half hour flight, and halfway through I got up to go to the toilet and fainted in the aisle. I came to with a ring of concerned faces above me and offers of oxygen and plane diversion. Very embarrassing.
The first few days of tour were horrendous and I tried really hard to mask my illhealth because my colleague had threatened me with a backside kicking if I came back to work when I was still sick. So fake it until you make it kicked in and by the end of the tour I felt much better.
I am now back in Perth for a few days and then back to Cairns, where I will do two back to back tours, eventually ending up in Perth again once we’ve come through the middle.
(I called up my boss to tell him the Health Department might contact him because salmonella is a communicable disease and told him that it came from unknown contact with a native animal – he misheard me and googled ‘salmonella from a naked animal’ and apparently the sleazy ads are immediately popping up on his feed!)